My writings


Oklahoma Fall morning

An Oklahoma Fall Morning






becareful when burning bridges



life is a suspension
between birth and death
between ancestors and unborn
between immaterial and material
between our father and our mother
between insight and ignorance
between adoration and indifference
between desire and revulsion
between faith and logic
between trust and suspicion
between compassion and fury
between confidence and insecurity
between light and darkness
and on and on…
Our life is the meeting place
the center core of a sphere of extremes
pulling tugging, pushing shoving
its here we live and move and have our being

just some morning thoughts….Sǫhahiyǫh 3/2014

Where are Our women?

What is this OVER-focus on Founding Fathers?

Why are Women are STILL so underrated, under-appreciated?

Is it because Women are too much like the earth we tread on?

seriously WTH??

WHY this perpetual infatuation with Male Leadership

Male superstars, Male bronzes, heavy on Male glory?

Is it because when men succeed, its simply more amazing to us?

seriously WTH??

Is it because as men we’re embarrassed  when our male bodies respond?

Do Strong women turn us on and so we respond by turning away (“oh shit”)

and  comfortably and limply, give the honors and awards to more men?

seriously WTH??

Every church steeple and every monolith, is still an erection of Male glory,

Where are our Monuments to honor our Mothers womb, and our Sisters power?

Open pit mines? Plunging oil drills into Mothers flesh? Fracking into her vital organs?

seriously WTH??


Implications of Heaven(and Hell)

When all is said and done, there’s often alot more sayin’ than doin’.

Do we REALLY examine the implications of the beliefs we cling to? Many heaven believers also believe in an eternal hell (after all its what they were “saved” from) .

But what are the Implications?

1st:  eternal divine ignorance.

If I could barely enjoy a wedding knowing that boys were outside torturing a frog, how could i enjoy “perfect joy” in eternity knowing that torture of a daughter or an uncle was going on at the same time?

What mother can enjoy a holiday at the beach when even one of her children has disappeared ? or worse, known to be held as a prisoner and being abused daily?

In heaven, we’re told, we’ll  be blissfully ignorant of the suffering of the damned. We won’t miss our children, or even think about them we’ll be too enraptured with “joy”

“Heavenly joy will be a state of ignorance”, we’ll be like babes snuggled and suckling at the breast of ones mother unaware of any sorrow or pain. So heaven will erase the love we now have for the damned.

the implications of this explanation are that in heaven we will know LESS than we know now. knowledge of truth will be kept from us.

2nd: eternal divine knowledge

Believers might be reassured, “we shall know as we are now known” . In other words, we are now humanly ignorant, but eternal damnation will make a lot more sense once we’re  saints enjoying heaven.

Whether its an enemy, a friend, or even a son or daughter suffering, knowledge of their eternal damnation will be “okay”. But what in heaven is simply Okay? In Heavens blissful state, Hell will give us overwhelming  joy knowing Gods justice is being served, even if its upon a child we raised. Its the price of having “free will”.

Enlightened with full knowledge, we’ll “agree with God”, that even though we raised that child, or had that mother, they’re getting what they deserve for not having  proper belief of the sacrifice offered for their sins.

We are in bliss, they are in hell…but Its the price of human beings owning true freedom to love without compulsion. Their eternal torture, in a way, insured my eternal bliss.

I have a serious problem with the implications of either theological explanation proposed….and i hope any reader here would also.


articulating gratefulness

Someday when i grow up I want to be able to articulate my thoughts better. But until then …i just have to wing it.

I feel for the recent tornado victims here in Okl, but I’m so very bothered by responses of survivors!

The typical response here is: “God spared our child” , “We were blessed” and all i can think of are the ones NOT spared, NOT blessed;

crumpled bodies of children, never to grow up, never experience first love, or become a father or mother, or help to create a better world.

Are people so hard and calloused? Why not think first? simply say “we are so sad for all the lives lost, and also humbly grateful to be alive”

To say “GOD decided to spare our children” is to say to the mother who lost her child, “sorry, I guess God decided NOT to spare yours”